As I'm sitting here venturing into the world that Dvorak creates in Symphony #7 - something my mom said to me today is replaying over and over in my head.
"I can't listen to music anymore, it makes me too sad."
I'm gravitating to it and my mom is fleeing from it. It breaks my heart to think that her life is not filled with music anymore. I know for certain it would break Leo's heart.
He is so missed - it's ridiculous.
I'm going to the Nashville Symphony tomorrow night and I'm a little nervous. Can I handle it? Will it make me cry? Will I sit there the entire time thinking about Leo? The ticket was only $20 total - so if I find myself not being able to contain myself - I can always leave. I cried as a high school conductor conducted Christmas carols in the lobby of my office building...how will I sit through the Nashville Symphony - in that beautiful hall...Leo and I toured it...he was so impressed by it...especially the organ.
I can do this...I want to go and not have a panic attack. I want to go and not cry. I want to enjoy the music and memories of Leo and not fall apart. I know one day it will happen. Until that day, I can just continue the best I can...
Kathryn
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