I had a bad day accompanied with lots of tears. I woke up to the most water I've ever seen in my backyard. Which, to those non-dog owners - this might mean nothing...but those that are dog owners...it's one of the biggest annoyances. I was already frustrated trying to convince the dogs they won't melt if they go outside - then getting myself ready and to work on time.
On my way to work, I called my mom to check on the status of the heat in her house. She lives in Michigan - it's cold up there. We were talking about the financial aspect of this...why stuff keeps happening...when is the break coming...then she made the comment of "if only Leo and I did estate plan..." then cut herself off to say "I just can't go there" then cried. I hate seeing her go through this - I want to make it disappear - to put the burden on me...isn't it enough to deal with the loss of a husband? Why is everything else happening?
What I'm about to say - I truly believe - my mom is one of the strongest people I know. She lost both her parents by the time she was 19, lost a daughter, now a husband...and she is still here...still doing the best she can. Still listening to my silly drama. I told her she will make it through this - but this time - she is alone and doesn't have Leo.
Tonight - I had plans with my friend Mandy. I love her...dearly. I feel rejuvenated when we hang out. She is one of the most lovely souls I know - and I'm really thankful that our paths are still crossing 10 years after we met. It was nice to get out - to talk about how I feel and just have a friend (besides Tracy) listen. To just let me cry - be sad - and ultimately - listen.
Really listen to me.
Thanks for a great night Mandy Mann!
Kathryn
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